Why Somalia is Poor and Hungry
- Somalia is Starving T Shirt
It's a Friday night and you're out with the boys. Crusing for vaginal interactions. Nothing on the brain but consuming fermented beverages, "Double Downs" from KFC, and spitting game.
Fast forward to 3:30am in the morning. Bile is flying up your esophagus and down into a lavatorial drain. It will slosh down the sewer pipes and run through a filtration system (93% effective) before being reused in the water tank at your grandmother's house.
You feel bad for being so gluttonous. You realize - man, there's all these starving people in Somalia... WHAT A BUZZKILL.
Lets analyze what is wrong with Somalia that causes its inhabitants to be poor and hungry.
1. What the hell is up with the SHAPE of the country?!
The shape is highly inefficient. Imagine a scenario where a potato is grown on the Western side of the country. Well OBVIOUSLY, by the time you get that spud over to the people in that weird tail part you ain't makin' no french fries. Here's a diagram to illustrate my point:
Somalia
2. They have pirates.
Look. I like Johnny Depp as much as the next guy and I cheered when he found his rightful place as the captain of the Black Pearl. But dude, pirates are BAD FOR THE ECONOMY. If you have any hope that one day your currency will be backed by actual gold in your country's treasury... skip the pirates, they won't stop touching your booty.
3. They haven't jumped on the revolution bandwagon.
Egypt's doing it, Tunisia's doing it, Libya... Come on Somalia! Overthrowing your government is the political makeover equivalent of being featured on MTV's "Made". Don't forget to post pictures on Facebook!
March 2nd, 2011 - 01:26
too funny for words.
March 2nd, 2011 - 01:26
i agree, poor people are funny.